What is an Au Pair?

I think many people do not understand what an au pair actually is, so I will try to explain is as best I can. Remember that the program varies in different countries, and I am specifically talking about Germany. In Germany, an au pair is a young man or woman between the ages of 18-24 (I turn 25 during my au pair year, but was 24 at the time I applied for my visa) that lives with a family for 1 year as a member of the family. The au pair helps take care of the children, does light housework (cooking, vacuuming, ironing, loading and emptying the dishwasher), for up to 30 hours per week. In exchange, the au pair receives room and board, as well as insurance, a tram pass, and enough free time to visit a language course. Of course the au pair receives a bit of money as well. This is not referred to as a salary, but "pocket money," as the au pair is not an employee, but a member of the family. Now you know :)

Changes

Changes I'm making, starting this week....

1) No charging ANYTHING on credit cards. There are always going to be "emergencies." If I cannot pay using a debit card or cash, I will save up for the item or *gasp* not buy it.

2) I will not buy any clothing or shoes that are of cheap quality, but rather will save up until I can afford their more expensive (and hopefully longer-lasting) counterparts.

3) I will save a percentage of my salary every month.

4) I will not spend more than the amount I have alotted myself unless I earn more money by freelancing.

5) I will NOT eat out more than 2x per week, unless I am on vacation and this is unavoidable.

Gloria Steinem forgive me for saying this, but I think that all young women should become au pairs, and not just because it allows a young woman to see another part of the world, but because it teaches the young woman about being a mother. Chances are, if one is working as an au pair, it is generally in a 2-income household. These women are working either a part or a full-time job and are looking for a bit of extra help at home. Such is the case with the family I am living with (and working for in Freiburg). The mother is a professor at a teacher's college. In addition to working she is expected to be an engaged mother when at home. I've always thought that was a difficult task, but now I'm experiencing how difficult it truly is.

As a child I always thought, "Darn it! I have to go to school, and mom gets to stay home and watch Oprah all day! Where is the justice in this world?" Now I know that my mom likely had little time to watch Oprah. In between the cleaning, the ironing, the organization of driving this child here and that child there, I doubt my mother was watching much television or "sitting around."

Of course, since moving out of the house nearly 4 years ago I discovered that there was a lot more to running a household than I thought, but it's a completely different ball game when one is a mother, or in this case, an au pair. There are lots of dirty dishes, messy rooms, etc. As a child one thinks very little about throwing things on the floor. They don't realize that all of the little messes add up. Children are seemingly unaware of the fact that adults tend to like to keep their houses clean. For one, it gives the owner a sense of ease and comfort, and another, who knows when an unexpected guest could stop by! It's embarrassing if the house looks like a pigsty.

My job is very tiring, but I enjoy it very much. I'm living in a new country with a family I met through an au pair website, taking care of their kids and becoming a member of the family. Not to mention the fact that I'm improving my cooking skills (which were nearly non-existent before my arrival) immensely.

There is so much more to running a household than I ever knew....

Bye for now, Molly

Molly's European Adventure has just turned into "Molly's Au Pair Adventure." Goals for the year:

1) Cook/bake something new every week.

2) Never buy things before I have the money (ie: with a credit card).

3) Write down everything I spend.

4) Save as much money as possible.

~Molly

Freiburg

A new city. A new family. A new house. A new room. A new life. Where is home? I don't know anymore. I've gone from being anxious about moving to being able to move from place to place, happy as long as I have a room with a bed. I have people around me, but I still feel alone. It's not an empty, forgotten feeling, but rather a sense that my decisions (and my life) are mine.

A new journey has begun. Where will it lead me? Only time will tell.